Fun places to be stoned in PORTLAND

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Photo By Christopher Brown /

Because stoners have more fun! Whether you are just visiting or live in Portland, I’ve got eight places you need to go to while stoned;

Green Mart Dispensary- First things first. Weed. This lovely dispensary is located in Beaverton (not far from downtown) and is a dream come true. Their selection is fantastic. Their staff is the best. You can’t go wrong. If you are looking for an affordable edible, ask for the sea salt caramel. They also have cheap pre-rolls in 4 packs.

OMSI- The Oregon Museum of Science & Industry. Most people think this is a place for kids. Wrong. You can certainly go through the museum but the real fun comes later in the evening with their OmniMax movies and laser light shows. The starry nights show in the planetarium is amazing. Or if you are into Pink Floyd, there is a laser light show to The Dark Side of the Moon on Friday and Saturday nights. EPIC! You’ll find yourself amongst friends.

Kennedy School McMenamins- This is my happy place. It’s an old elementary school converted into a unique hotel, bar, and theatre. They also have a soaking pool and a little gift shop. The walls are lined with bizarre art and the ceilings are full of eclectic lamps. They have several restaurants and bars to choose from. Some are small and intimate, others are busy and full of life. There is a beautiful outdoor courtyard lined with twinkle lights. If you are into beer, this is your place. Be sure to try the cajun tater tots. You can also catch a movie at the funky theatre, where you can drink and eat inside. Heaven on earth.

Oaks Amusement Park- If you are traveling in a group, this would be a fun adventure. It’s a older amusement park that still holds a lot of charm. Rides, slides, carnival games, miniature golf, and you can even go roller skating. Their is a place to picnic with food and drink available. The area is beautiful, right along the Willamette River. Don’t forget a snow cone!

Beyond Bizarre Ghost Tours- If you are at all interested (or curious) about paranormal activity, this is your jam. I had a friend drag me along to this and secretly loved every spooky second. It’s a walking tour so it’s very relaxed. The highlight is when you go underground and use professional equipment to locate a known ghost of the area. A lot of fun to be had. Be sure to book ahead online.

Food Carts- Every city has food carts, but we have a whole block downtown. If you love to eat, this is where you need to be. Walk around first to scope out all the different cuisines and then everyone in your group can eat what they want. They have tables on the sidewalks, but its fun to head across the street to Pioneer Courthouse square and people watch while eating.

Glowing Greens Miniature Golf- This is an indoor blacklight, 3D, animated, miniature golf course. It takes about an hour to walk through the pirate themed mayhem. There are two locations; Beaverton & Portland. They also have arcade games so bring quarters!

Portland Spirit River Cruise- So. Much. Fun. This one is on the spendy side but it’s so worth it. They have a few different types of river cruises available. I’ve done the dinner cruise several times now. You have a three course meal on a gorgeous boat, then head up on the deck to enjoy the sights. It made me feel like a stoner princess. They also have a lunch, brunch, and sightseeing cruises. If you are really adventurous, there is a jetboat ride that I’ve been told is a blast in the summer.

Now let’s get high!