How to roll MAGIC JOINTS

bRIAN BECKWITH UNSPLASH
Photo by Brian Beckwith / Unsplash.com

Weed is magic and there are countless ways to enjoy it. Let’s take a look at how to roll specialty joints so you can take your game to the next level.

CROSS JOINT

Let the master (Seth Rogen) show us how to roll a cross joint. After watching Pineapple Express years ago, I became obsessed. You have to do it at least once. And it’s not nearly as difficult as it looks. Bring it to a party and enjoy being the most popular stoner there.

 

BRAIDED TWISTY JOINT

These are so clever and make me feel like Rihanna when I smoke them. I went through a lot of rolling papers learning how, but it’s sweet success when it finally comes together.

 

PIPE JOINT

Yes. It’s a joint shaped like a pipe. This would be an epic gift for a stoner friend. Then you can smoke it together. Win Win.

 

TULIP JOINT

These pretty joints aren’t just for girls. They hit hard and will be the life of the party.

 

KING SIZE JOINT

While the others are so unique, this is just a big ol’ fatty joint. Just as exciting and takes skill to roll.

 

Go get those rolling papers and start creating your own smokable art. Signing off with some mind blowing inspiration. Thanks for reading and be sure to let me know in comments if I’m missing any unique joints.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

10 rules of the SMOKE CIRCLE

Chris Benson Unsplash
Photo by Chris Benson / Unsplash.com

Fact: Stoners like to gather in circles and get high. Let’s explore ten classic rules that often go unspoken.

1. BYOF (BRING YOUR OWN FLOWER)

Contribute. Every time. It’s as easy as that if you want to be invited back.

2. PASS LEFT

Always pass left. Even when you are camping, hot-boxing a car, or at the top of a mountain. If it’s not possible to pass left, you need to invite more people to this party.

3. NO BULLYING

Some people can smoke copious amounts of weed and still function. Bless you Snoop Dogg! Others take two hits and they are contemplating an ER visit. It’s proper etiquette to let those who need to bow out do so gracefully.

4. RELOAD

Never pass ash. When the bong is empty, or you’re at the end of the joint, don’t pass it on. It’s your turn to re-load or re-roll.

5. DON’T PASS A BUG

If you are sick, smoke on your own and let people know. Nobody wants to get the flu from smoking a joint.

6. NO SPIT

Keep your saliva to yourself. Nothing ruins a perfectly rolled blunt faster than a wet end. Keep is classy. Keep it dry.

7. NO LIFE STORIES

Whether your smoking buddies are strangers or best friends, the smoke circle is not the time to tell your life story or pitch a business idea. Keep it light and don’t use up all the oxygen in the room.

8. NO PARKING

Don’t forget others are waiting for their turn. Take one hit and pass it. It is generally frowned upon to sit and smoke alone while everyone watches

9. LOSE THE PHONE

It’s hard to connect with people while staring at a screen. The whole experience is lost if you don’t engage. Ditch the electronics and enjoy yourself.

10. BE GRATEFUL

Be sure to thank the host, especially if you smoked all their weed and ate all their Oreos. Stoner friends thrive when their is proper balance. Always return the favor.

 

-Thanks for reading. Are there any smoke circle rules that I missed? Let me know in comments.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5 Stoner Friendly APPS

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Photo by Rodion Kutsaev / Unsplash.com

Here are five (free) apps that I HIGHLY recommend;

 

NINJA

CLUMSY NINJA  

This game is super addicting. You advance through the levels while training your ninja. There are punching bags, trampolines, balloons, and watermelons involved. Not only are the characters ridiculously adorable, but it’s oddly satisfying to punch and kick things with miniature ninjas.

 

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PICSART

This app is my life. I discovered it over a year ago and haven’t gone a day without using it. You can edit photo’s, draw, color, and connect with other artists. If you want to post your creations, you can create your own gallery (page) and build a following. The community of artists and photographers are so inspiring and kind. It’s my favorite app to get lost in while on edibles.

 

DUBY

DUBY – WEED SOCIAL NETWORK

Connect with all your fellow stoners on this social network app. This is your (privacy protected) haven for all things weedy and green. Promote your business, shop, meet like-minded people, and learn new things about your favorite plant and strains.

 

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GRUBHUB

This app is a pleasure for all people, but I have to think stoners appreciate it the most. A typical scenario for us is getting blazed and being unable to drive. No longer is pizza delivery your only option. For a small fee you can satisfy that intense craving for Italian, Thai, or even donuts. Place the order, pay, and before you know it your food is at your front door. This app is sent straight from heaven and I would kiss the creator if I could.

 

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VIBIN WEED EMOJI KEYBOARD

This is a fun way to personalize your text messages. You can drop emoji’s, stickers, strain info, and weed graphics straight into a text box. No more settling for the hidden meanings in regular emoji’s. Be a proud stoner and spice things up!

 

-Thanks for reading and let me know if I am missing out on any other stoner friendly apps!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

8 signs weed is your SUPERPOWER

sharon McCutcheon
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon / Unsplash.com

1. YOU ARE HAPPY

You are happy and you know it. You appreciate everything you have just a little more with less focus on what you don’t have. You smile and laugh. Miraculously other peoples ignorance, anger, or unhappiness isn’t able to take hold of you either. It may be the ultimate stoner superpower. When you are content, those around you tend to be too!

2. YOU ARE MORE SOCIAL

You are just an all around friendlier person after you get your head right. We know weed can bring people together, and it can relax those with social anxieties. Less overthinking. More saying hello to strangers. This can certainly be life changing.

3. YOU FEEL MORE CONFIDENT

You spend less time worried about your appearance and more about being a better person. When you are less concerned about what people think of you, it can be liberating and infectious to those around you. You can use that newfound energy to do other things like volunteering, making new friends, and trying new experiences. Shine on!

4. YOU ARE MORE CREATIVE

Whether it’s painting, writing, photography, or cooking. Your craft is at its best when you are stoned. You have new ideas, take risks, and let go. This frees you up to create instead of thinking too much. You will likely have more fun with it too.

5. YOU SLEEP, WELL

Your bedroom is your sanctuary. You may even have twinkle lights hanging. It seems right to spend a full eight (or more) hours sleeping each night if you can. After all, without good sleep, we wouldn’t be able to wake and bake properly.

6. YOU FEEL LESS PAIN

Whether you are dealing with chronic pain, usual aches and pains, migraines, emotional pain, or grief. You feel better after getting high. You have a healthy appetite and are able to focus on something other than feeling bad. There is no substitute for that relief.

7. YOU SPREAD THE LOVE

You share your love of weed with others. It’s your mission to let others know how life changing it is and is the first thing you suggest when someone is sad or stressed out. You often wonder how anyone can live without it.

8. YOU DITCHED THE BOOZE

You are so content with how you feel when you’re high that you no longer want to drink. Mixing the two can certainly kill the good vibes. It’s a beautiful thing to say goodbye to the spins, sad toilet vomiting, and killer hangovers.

 

-Let’s keep spreading the word about the benefits of cannabis. It’s clear we are on the right track! Let me know in comments what your other stoner superpowers are.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

25 stoner PET NAMES

Japeth Mast
Photo by Japheth Mast / Unsplash.com

Have we taken our love of weed too far when we name our pet something obviously stoner related? I say just far enough. I’ve done it four times. It makes me happy when I’m surrounded by everything Mary Jane, which was my first cats name. It fit her brilliantly with her gorgeous emerald eyes. Here’s some inspiration if you are looking for a name for your new best friend. Some are incognito if you want to pretend it was pure coincidence. I won’t say a word.

INDO: I start here because this is my cat’s name. She’s fluffy and gray. It came to me as soon as I met her because she’s the color of smoke. She’s sort of a legend around these parts.

SNOOP: Ok, this is my other cat’s name. He’s the most handsome and loving boy in the whole world. Clearly he needed an EPIC name.

BLAZE: This is a happy name. Perfection for any type of animal. Bonus points if they have red or orange hair.

CANNON: Can you get much higher? It’s extremely clever if you have a runner on your hands.

AUNT MARY: Slang. Unique and is a bit formal which is always funny for pet names. A pet so nice you named it twice.

HOUDINI: Because you escape reality. Voila! This one offers plausible deniability that it’s herb related, and would suit a cat well.

NUGGET: Slang for herb. Let’s reserve this name for the cutest of the cute because it’s so precious.

KUSH: Fun popular strain reference. If your pet is pleasantly plump, this is it! Imagine how cute their collar nametag will be.

JAY: If you love joints as much as I do, this seems like a no brainer for a male. He’ll need a bow tie for sure.

DURBAN: This just sounds like a pet name. Partial nod to the phenomenal strain Durban Poison. Mark my words, he or she will be the shot caller of the neighborhood.

BUDDHA: Slang. Classic. This would fit so many animals and would be a good conversation starter.  It could be your little secret.

HYDRO: Alluding to the method of growing indoor flower hydroponically. If your pet really likes water it would be sheer genius.

TWIST: Slang for a joint. He or she he will be a total badass.

CHIEF: Reference to smoking herb and suitable for all animals. A handkerchief will be their signature ensemble.

FROSTY: Another fierce strain. Also a reference to the white crystally goodness on nugs. If you have a white pet this would be pure gold.

GOO: Indica strain. It’s unusual and sweet at the same time. I think I found my next cat’s name.

YODA: Jackpot if you are a Star Wars and weed fanatic. Yoda OG is a first-class strain as well. This pet will likely be infamous. Get their Instagram ready.

DOJA: Uncommon slang for herb. Only your most accomplished stoner friends will catch this one.

ROCKET: If you’ve got a track star, this would be just right. It’s also a clear indication that you may like to get high.

DIESEL: The name of a wicked strain. It’s a more common name for pets, and would be a fantastic name for a large dog.

MUNCH: When you’ve got a case of the munchies. Dual purpose if your pet lives at the food dish.

CHINO: Slang for weed. Memorable and fun. Prepare for some mischief from this little one.

GASPER: An old school term for joint. I’m sure it will start a trend.

KUMAR: One half of the hysterical stoner duo Harold & Kumar. This pet is destined for greatness.

DAZE: Last but certainly not least. One syllable which is great for a dog.

-If you name your pug Nugget, be sure to let me know so I can die happy. I hope you took away a few ideas. Did I miss a great name? Let me know in comments.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fun places to be stoned in PORTLAND

Christopher Brown - Unsplash
Photo By Christopher Brown / Unsplash.com

Because stoners have more fun! Whether you are just visiting or live in Portland, I’ve got eight places you need to go to while stoned;

Green Mart Dispensary- First things first. Weed. This lovely dispensary is located in Beaverton (not far from downtown) and is a dream come true. Their selection is fantastic. Their staff is the best. You can’t go wrong. If you are looking for an affordable edible, ask for the sea salt caramel. They also have cheap pre-rolls in 4 packs.

https://www.greenmartpdx.com/

OMSI- The Oregon Museum of Science & Industry. Most people think this is a place for kids. Wrong. You can certainly go through the museum but the real fun comes later in the evening with their OmniMax movies and laser light shows. The starry nights show in the planetarium is amazing. Or if you are into Pink Floyd, there is a laser light show to The Dark Side of the Moon on Friday and Saturday nights. EPIC! You’ll find yourself amongst friends.

https://omsi.edu/

Kennedy School McMenamins- This is my happy place. It’s an old elementary school converted into a unique hotel, bar, and theatre. They also have a soaking pool and a little gift shop. The walls are lined with bizarre art and the ceilings are full of eclectic lamps. They have several restaurants and bars to choose from. Some are small and intimate, others are busy and full of life. There is a beautiful outdoor courtyard lined with twinkle lights. If you are into beer, this is your place. Be sure to try the cajun tater tots. You can also catch a movie at the funky theatre, where you can drink and eat inside. Heaven on earth.

https://www.mcmenamins.com/kennedy-school

Oaks Amusement Park- If you are traveling in a group, this would be a fun adventure. It’s a older amusement park that still holds a lot of charm. Rides, slides, carnival games, miniature golf, and you can even go roller skating. Their is a place to picnic with food and drink available. The area is beautiful, right along the Willamette River. Don’t forget a snow cone!

http://oakspark.com/index.html

Beyond Bizarre Ghost Tours- If you are at all interested (or curious) about paranormal activity, this is your jam. I had a friend drag me along to this and secretly loved every spooky second. It’s a walking tour so it’s very relaxed. The highlight is when you go underground and use professional equipment to locate a known ghost of the area. A lot of fun to be had. Be sure to book ahead online.

http://www.portlandwalkingtours.com/

Food Carts- Every city has food carts, but we have a whole block downtown. If you love to eat, this is where you need to be. Walk around first to scope out all the different cuisines and then everyone in your group can eat what they want. They have tables on the sidewalks, but its fun to head across the street to Pioneer Courthouse square and people watch while eating.

http://www.foodcartsportland.com/

Glowing Greens Miniature Golf- This is an indoor blacklight, 3D, animated, miniature golf course. It takes about an hour to walk through the pirate themed mayhem. There are two locations; Beaverton & Portland. They also have arcade games so bring quarters!

https://www.glowinggreens.com/

Portland Spirit River Cruise- So. Much. Fun. This one is on the spendy side but it’s so worth it. They have a few different types of river cruises available. I’ve done the dinner cruise several times now. You have a three course meal on a gorgeous boat, then head up on the deck to enjoy the sights. It made me feel like a stoner princess. They also have a lunch, brunch, and sightseeing cruises. If you are really adventurous, there is a jetboat ride that I’ve been told is a blast in the summer.

http://www.portlandspirit.com/

Now let’s get high!